Why Awareness ?

Always cribbing about having attention issues, i solely thought that it awareness that i lacked. I just got to let myself become aware, be living right in the present. And that’s it everyone can live happily ever after.

Yes awareness is wonderful when we think of life in terms of getting things done. Go from Point A to Point B nothing more to this. So I was yearning for execution because I have been feeling inferior that I’m unable to finish what I started.

Was Brain Fog the Culprit ?

Well having multiple interests is cool but having interests just because I’m bored of regular things is kind of detrimental. I played against myself in this one. Again. Im still missing the point. The point is I’m aware, because I live it everyday. So, maybe I have successfully learnt to not be aware of figure out a way in a natural process to become not aware.

This is just a symptom of something else, something that is just not awareness and something that is elusive when I think of it.

Stacking Self Sabotage

Me be being aware that I’m getting distracted wasn’t just enough. Knowing that im unable to finish the things that i take up is something I dont want to be aware it its just hurting me further.

I have just been piling these failures by being aware, this has only contributed to me feeling insignificant and may be feel depressed even. I made the goal or doing the task or action part and kept that as the utmost priority. May be there isn’t more to that just finish it and get going. But, I think I need something more. Why is it that when i do certain things I completely get lost that time just isn’t a dimension anymore?

I couldn’t pin point it until, My Well wisher and confidant Srikanth Pointed it out to me.

I Had the Wrong Equation While Expecting the Right Answers

I was made aware that I just completely deleted the part ‘Me’ from this. The “Me” in me requires something more than just tasks, targets and goals to get going. And that only I could answer.

The answer was staring right at me, all these self criticism and belittling that i showered on myself have taken a toll on me. The “me” in me requires a lot more to get off the ground as a result. The ability to finish the task has become more of a pain than something motivating. Even though its for my best I fail to see how its helpful when it forced upon me and I have to do it just for the sake of doing it.

The ‘me’ in me has depleted all the attention and nurturing love I had for myself that I stopped giving it the love it needed. I stopped being compassionate towards myself, because a empty shell of an existence.

This ‘Me’ Needs more than just Attention Now

I realised that Self Kindness is the need of the hour. Being grateful of everything I have rather than complaining ended up putting a spin on all the negative spirals or tangents my brain would take me to.

Self Kindness is easy to say but very difficult to practice. Now that I’m practicing it, I’m witnessing the flow of happiness in me again. Until this bowl of love is full I will never be able to finish things that I start because the ‘Me’ in me demands love as a payment to get going.

I’m a slave to love, when im slave to me its even better. This love has only poured out to my friends, brothers,

family infact even stranger are kind when the we choose to experience the world with kindness.

Conclusion

If you are also going through a tough time, I hope you give yourself a chance and be kinder to yourself. Compassion to self is all we as humans need the lack of it only creates chaos everywhere beyond us. Being kinder to oneself is the greatest service one can do to for him or herself, the world has always been kind.

I’m writing this as a part of my scheduled time blocked period. That I’m currently looking at in my digital watch. Today I’m going to go over the what amazing knowledge my friend Mrinmoy imparted to me few days back. So, What is time blocking?

Disclosure of my struggle and its broader effects with time

I have for the best part of my life suffered with time management. Either by being late to something or failing to deliver things on time. The consequences…

The consequences of being late or not being aware of time were as follows,

1. Low Self Confidence

2. Low Self Esteem

3. Irritation

4. Feeling of always being in a loosing battle

5. Loosing respect from the people because

And more.

Why so?

I believe this is because primarily because of time blindness. I don’t think I have had the ability to perceive time like other people. Listen to me, I’m not complaining to escape but this is the gratitude that I’m finally aware that there is such a thing holding me back from being effective.

Because, I never understood the concept of time and its effect as a dimension. I would always feel I have all the time in the world to waste this amazing resource away.

And how does time blindness look like?

• Being a yes man, I was always available to people even though I had other plans

• Conflicts with people because I said yes to a lot of people without understanding of keeping a track in terms of time commitments

• Failure of timely delivery

• Over indulgence in pleasurable experiences that everything else becomes trivial

• Fear of commitment

Now that you know what time blindness is, let us see how I was able to make it reappear.

Catching Hold of Time Red Handed

The trick to making time appear and become tangible is to make it visible and felt. That’s what i did and thankfully. This is is one of the best success story of how technology has improved anyones life.

I happened to own a galaxy smartwatch with android wear built. But I believe any programmable or a watch with app ecosystems would do.

The first thing to ensure is that the watch has vibration motor that is sufficiently strong that you feel the vibration quite clearly. This is the kinaesthetic part of the awareness of time.

The second part of the process of making the time visible is to ensure that the time is always visible to your eyes. A watch with always on display is ideal. Similarly, ensure the digital numbers on the screen is as big as possible.

Both of these are great but something that really pushed this to the next level is.

And that is the planning part.

How to plan the time?

Take the entire 24-hours of the day and not leaving any part of the day vacant. Account for the entirety of 24-hours. That includes sleep, exercise, breakfast, commute, work, etc.

The mandatory part is to just ensure every part of the time is blocked.

Here’s the fun part. I inserted it in my google calendar. Which in turn is synced to my watch. So, the beginning and ending of every part of the blocked time my watch vibrates with the next task or the activity that is about to start. This has given me an immense amount of awareness of how little the time is and how granted I have taken it all my life.

This has really opened my life to a new dimension. A dimension of time that is.

What if I Missed the Schedule?

That is absolutely fine! This is not about beating yourself up of myself up because I do that a lot. Real life is seldom akin to the plan we make but the closer to the plan the better! So even if i miss the schedule by sometime. I cover for the missed time or task elsewhere or push it to the next available time slot which I recalculate before I hit the bed.

A Gratitude For This Revelation

I’m extremely grateful for Mrinmoy to sit with me and breakdown the entire day into these chunks. Thus revealing the beautiful thing that the time is. And making me understand that time is beautiful, it is power, it is wealth, and when it is respected it gives back 10,000 fold in aspects one can’t even imagine.

Microsoft shipped the systems with the internet explorer preloaded and with it. I did not know what vendor lock in was back then. Well it wasn’t me even the adults around me did not know what it was let alone a 5 year old kid.

But now i know better. I know better because I have burnt my hand using closed source software that stopped working because the company that maintained the cloud server for my product (pebble time steel) got bankrupt. So for a while till the app was in the app store it was fine. As the new regulations for hosting apps in the appstore changed. Thanks apple! The companion app for my beloved pebble time steel just vanished overnight.

Now i was just left with a watch that was smart in every sense except it wasn’t because the connection to the brain (via phone processor using bluetooth) for it to be smart got severed. This gave me a reason to explore the open source apps market as well as the open access operating systems such as linux, android and windows.

So explore i did after ditching my apple iphone 6s. I got the real feel for the freedom of choice. Oh! and did I tell you that the android play store also had the companion app hosted which wouldn’t last for long but i also had the option to install the app using apk file so it was all good in the hood.

This gave me an opportunity to look for applications and systems that i use daily that are closed and if i can find any open source version of the same.

The first one in our series would actually be an operating system,

Linux - I started using Linux via Ubuntu by Canonical. One of the most widely used linux operating system by the developers as well as enthusiast. Using ubuntu wasn’t easy initially due to steep learning curve in the command line mode as the GUI existed just for sake of existing in the initial days if the linux that i was in.
Things are not the same any more though.

Ubuntu - yes it has taken massive leaps in usability as well as the support for packaged apps like flatpak have made the nightmare of navigating the GUI a breeze.

Another really good looking linux distribution i got to use was POP OS! Another one of the bangers that is really easy use and with crazy hardware support as the developers of the Operating system themselves are a hardware manufacturers for the linux ecosystem.

That’s all in this iteration of the blog folks! Let’s continue exploring other open source products in the next post!.

Naval’s Point of view about technology is very unique and is very observational directly from the heart of the tech innovations, “silicon valley”. Naval in one of the interview with Joe Rogan said that eventually the entire company stack could run APIs. And I believe that too!

How did I come to that conclusion you may ask?🤔

I have been playing with various AI based LLMs for a very long time. One thing that they need to process and give desired outputs is a good source of information which then gets ingested via the LLM. And how do get a good vetted source of information you guessed it! via APIs.

Not just that i also can deliver my processed data in a desired format using APIs. So literally I’m able to go to and fro within this data processing stream using APIs.

So, respected readers and friends of mine (you know who you are!) who i forced to subscribe to my substack. I’m embarking on a journey to learn remove all my knowledge gaps that I have with the API dimension of the internet while making various parts clear to you as I venture deeper.

Introduction to API

So API stands for Application Programming Interface.

What does API do?

API is like the wire between monitor and CPU, the output of CPU is displayed in the monitor. Similarly, the inputs from keyboards and mice is carried using these wires across to the CPU to process and display the output in the monitor.

So literally its like a wire or a messenger between various programs. However, APIs are messengers with instructions for delivery and pickup. One company will be like I will only give the data if your request is kind with loads of love so your request is nothing short of love and kindness you shall never get the good stuff “data”! Similarly the program that gives out the response to the request is also formatted in a particular way which we need to know for us to successfully make use of the data sent back to us.

This is just the tip of the iceberg!

Examples of various programs that can make use of APIs and How?

1. Web Services - Social media such as Facebook, Twitter(Now X), Reddit, etc offer their APIs to interact with them. For example i want to retrieve all of my tweets and store it locally. I can do so by using the api provided by twitter, where twitter expects me to use a secret key they provide me to be included in the request so they identify that itsa me MArio! and that i intend to retrieve all of my tweets so far. Now that twitter has received my request via api with my authentication it will deliver the output.

2. Payment Processors(PP) - The process is similiar with pp, say i were to buy something from an online shop. My online store will tally all the products you put into the cart then send the final amount to the pp via API. So pp will then collect the payment on my behalf of me and deposit that sweet sweet moolah into my bank account which also happens via API.

3. Databases (DB) - We can do the same to db also, by using API to update, create, delete, and read the contents of the db with out ever touching any interface or using CLI (looking at you Myqsl). Look Ma! no hands!

I’m just gonna tell you about various other systems that offers APIs and also its not an exhaustive list either but here’s my small list,

• Ai & Machine Learning Models

• Mapping Services

• Hardware Devices

• Enterprise Appications

• Operating Systems

Installation and Preparation

There are various ways to create an API. In this blog, I’m just exploring the creation REST API, we will go over the other types later.

About My System

I own a m1 MBA (macbook air) with MacOs Sequoia. So your mileage may vary.

Getting Started

I will need to first install Nodejs. This is the website to download the application.

However, I will be using homebrew to install nodejs.

you can easily install homebrew to your mac using the following command.

/bin/bash -c "$(curl -fsSL https://raw.githubusercontent.com/Homebrew/install/HEAD/install.sh)"

once installed we can check the version of the node that was installed by homebrew by typing the following command -

node -v

Oh yeah, when you install node it also installs npm which is a node package manager which will come in handy once we start going crazy with development.

so the command to check that is,

npm -v

The Fun Begins!

We start off by creating a directory or a “folder” (as some windows users would like to call it).

Name it anything! I like short names so ima call the directory “api”.

navigate to the destination directory using the ‘cd’ command,

Then we initialize the directory using npm init command. The init command asks us to enter few details like name of the project, version, description, author, license, etc.
HIT ENTER and move on. Don’t be like me and add details, if you do add the details to self descriptive fields that would be aaaok!

Installation of Express \m/

It’s very simple just do npm install express.

There you go.

Conclusion

Today we learnt the installation of Nodejs and Expressjs. In the next article we will explore how to put these to use to build our own API.

Feature 1: Infinite Canvas

I fell in love with this the moment I started using an app called Concepts. It is geared more towards hardcore designers and technical drawing creators, but the infinite canvas feature won me over. Infinite Canvas really opens up a world of limitless possibilities. Every other feature they offer is just a good-to-have feature for me personally.

Feature 2: Text Translation

I would say, please add this feature as the core functionality of the operating system already! The ability to translate written text as a digital text doc is invaluable. I write my stuff on my iPad as I really feel writing on the iPad is a joy of its own. So, writings getting directly translated would greatly help humanity. Yes, Apple has translation as a part of the writing toolset, but it only translates my writing into text in real-time and doesn't preserve my original written content.

There is one fabulous app that I found to do this: Nebo. Trust me, Nebo offers both Infinite Canvas and handwritten texts to docs. This truly has added joy to my life as I'm able to go from thought to text seamlessly. Self Expression: 1000%.

Feature 3: Organization

Our written documents should be categorized and foldered properly. When I'm really pushed to think within a narrow context and time limit, I should be able to call upon my previous learnings immediately, effectively creating my personal experience database. Apple Notes offers this, and almost all writing apps offer this feature. I feel it is an overlooked feature by most that could really change your life if used effectively.

Bonus Features: Knowledge Graphs

These features are something I classify as good to have. I have used apps like Logseq and Obsidian, which have knowledge graphs. What the knowledge graph does for me is help me visually see how the topics I have logged in my database are connected or linked to other topics. This really comes in handy for me whenever I'm having writer's block.

This is a holistic feature list I have used across various apps, though not all at once. That would definitely be a dream come true. However, as just a tool to help express this in the form of writing content, these apps have helped me tons.

Nebo

I'm writing this blog on Nebo; it has become my go-to tool now. It has a lifetime tier for adding unlimited books, documents, et al. If you just intend to write and take the written content as text and move it to another app, I personally use it this way. I can store my handwritten content within the app and have my document exported as text that can then be ingested and processed in a separate app.

In the next article, let's explore knowledge base apps.

Driving Analogy

If we don't understand how a steering wheel works, we can't steer the car, resulting in us ending up somewhere unintended. Similarly, if I don't know where the indicator switches are, I can't alert the driver behind me of my intention to turn, potentially causing a collision. Our bodies and minds work mysteriously. Until we decipher them, our reactions will always be afterthoughts. This is the blind spot I've been dealing with for a long time.

Observation

I've started seeing myself as a separate entity in a game. But in this game, the controls are programmed differently. Pressing the left arrow key might not move the character left. So, every action I take needs deliberation. The results inform me about the character's behavior. This isn't a one-time thing; it's mostly a process of surrendering.

Surrendering My Ego (Myself)

The idea of self needs complete surrender. The POV game I'm playing doesn't adhere to my whims and wishes. Only by letting go of control can I understand the character's (Host's Controls) motivations and respond accordingly. My current knowledge is outdated and will only yield losses or dissatisfaction. Now that I've surrendered to this machine, I can begin the journey of understanding the host's controls using curiosity.

Curiosity

A fine line separates genuine curiosity and madness. It all comes down to the intent behind our actions.

Genuine Curiosity

To an untrained eye, curiosity might appear like repeatedly doing the same thing. But each action is slightly different, informing the next. It's deliberate and nuanced.

Plain Madness

Plain madness is simply doing the same thing repeatedly without learning from past actions. This is where most people succumb to complaining and pure hate as coping mechanisms. I understand this now and will be kinder to them.

Conclusion

I prefer "awareness" over "mindfulness." Awareness comes from a place of pure curiosity and no judgment, as there's no ego. Awareness also means building better databases. Let's explore this further in the next blog.

I constantly lose track of what I'm learning because I lack a system to record my daily learnings. But lately, I've been making changes in my day-to-day life to accommodate the new information I learn every day for better absorption and storage.

Let me tell you, I didn't stumble upon this realization by myself. Thanks to my friend Ninad, I've learned a lot from him throughout my life. He introduced me to the concept of creating a database to organize daily learnings by type and interest. He uses Notion to its full potential with APIs and its rules, but we don't need to go that far.

I've built a simpler version so far. Unlike Ninad, I also need to track my emotions, gratitude, relationships, and learnings separately. I created a Google Form with a few fields that I identified as important to log every day. This data is then stored in a Google Sheet that I can access from anywhere, anytime. Each sheet is separate, allowing me to review what's necessary at any given moment.

I used to write in a diary, but that felt like a privacy nightmare since the contents could be read by others I wouldn't want to see them. So, I still felt hesitant to fully express myself. That's why Google Forms work better for me.

You can try physical books directly. I've been a longtime follower of the extraordinary Tim Ferriss. He races through books in just a few days. He meticulously tracked a vast amount of data every day to improve himself. These books are then coded with strategically placed sticky notes for clear categorization. You can try that if you prefer a strictly physical method.

I definitely prefer my approach, and I also use an iPad to keep things digital. This is the only method that seems to work for me.

I recommend trying different methods for cataloging your daily learnings, gratitude, emotions, relationships, etc. Review your learnings at least once a week, if not daily, to become well-rounded. You can definitely gain significant value from your own life if you properly maintain, record, and process your daily experiences and learnings.

In the next blog, I'll discuss how I effectively use each of these software and hardware in my day-to-day life.

Here's the fear that has been lingering in my mind for a very long time. Even before the mainstream media started reporting about this. Even before people started losing their jobs in droves from the tech sector.

Artificial Intelligence (Entity) will take our jobs.

This was a very scary idea even to think about—not having any source of income even to feed oneself, let alone thinking about other non-essential items for survival.

Why was I thinking like this?

My dad used to work for a company that manufactured bolts and fasteners. It was quite a good job by his standards. Until the clients of his company started getting cheaper products from competing countries like China. Add this with a dash of bad management, and the entire charade came crashing down.

That was all the skill he had and got to learn when he first came to a new Tier 1 city like Bombay with hope in his eyes to make it. I saw my dad be at home without work, trying his best to get a job because he had a family to take care of—two young kids and his wife in an alien city.

I was a witness to this period of our family. And this anxiety has always persisted deep in the back of my mind.

Why am I telling this to you?

Of course, to get your sympathy. /initiate sarcasm/

So while scrolling through some art pages of some artists, i came across a new platform that wants to give an elevated instagram like social media experience to artists without using their art as a fodder to train an AI.

The app’s name is cara.

This platform is for the artists, by the artist (Jingna Zhang).

This platform reminds me of ello the social media app that tried to take on facebook. Hopefully cara succeeds. 🤞

So while exploring, i ended up loosing myself in the finer things in life ergo art.

I remembered the time creating things that I loved. Not for others to pay me. Not for others to appreciate me. But just because I liked it.

I haven't had such a feeling or state in a while, but thinking back to that now i resonate with that feeling deeply.

**Creation is divine.**

**Creation is penance.**

**Creation is love.**

**Creation is joy.**

**Creation is formless.**

**Creation is form-full.**

**Creation is pain.**

But ultimately, **creation is to be human.**

Even AI can write, create images, create videos, replace me completely. I would still prefer the experience of me creating something. Creating something because I want to. Creating something not because there is a finite endpoint—which AI has to ultimately surrender itself to.

Because creation is the epitome of human expression.

**Creation is Freedom.**

**To create is to be human.**

For more of my musings Subshib to me. 🐶

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